Our pledges to the voters of Britain
We will turn the Houses of Parliament into a comedy club
We will increase supplies of laughing gas in the NHS
We will introduce Fool Schools across the country
We will put Laughing Policemen on the beat
We will replace the pound with Monopoly money
We will replace local mayors with official council Jesters
We will use the hot air produced by MPs to generate electricity
We will make Tom Fool's birthday a national holiday
We will increase spending, reduce taxes and cut debt
We will sell the family silver – the nation’s grannies
But if you have any better ideas please let us know! You can send us your favourite foolish policies on the Tom Fool Facebook page or by Tweeting @TheTomFool on Twitter.